Monday, March 12, 2012

Never too old to be It.

I live in a neighbourhood populated by the far reaches of the continuum -- there are young families with tiny children and very old ladies, and not a whole lot in between.

And my question is, where do all these old ladies get their polyester double knit elastic waisted pants? Somewhere in the universe there is a shopping mall that only the grey-haired know about, filled with shops in turn filled with row upon row of these pants and a crowd of elderly women scooping them up in bulk.

The mall also sells a kind of plastic trainer as well, with soft soles and kind of shapeless upper because the army of the elderly in this neighbourhood also sport those. So the mall must be nearby, these ladies don't walk all that well.

But here's the thing -- horrible as I find these clothes to be, the greyhounds of the 'hood are the muses of the moment. I've looked at all the Fall 2012 (for this is the real season in my own particular world) offerings saw fit to cover and the one ubiquitous message is something along the lines of "big, baggy, shapeless in colours insulting to nature is IN". Which, generally speaking, is how these dames dress.

Witness Celine, which has launched many a trend in the past few years such that every brand looks quite a bit like it. For fall we have coats big enough to hide the groceries under, voluminous trousers, boxy tops. For the most part Chanel showed piles of clothes, skirts over pants with jackets and coats and tops stacked sufficient to keep you in good nick should you need to traverse the Siberian desert to safety. Louis Vuitton? Also had "volume" in mind, topped with dotty hats. In fact, "square" is the shape of the moment.

I think colour is refreshing after decades of black, and here my old gals are ahead of their time as well. They show no fear in mixing it up, with lots of red factoring in with orange or yellow or brown or whatever happens to be at hand. I always thought this would be the fun and relaxing thing about old age -- to go out garish and clashing, assaulting eyes everywhere with impunity. I already have a collection of rather bright lipsticks, for the right time and place.

And so this year we see many pages from their manual, with brights upon brights topped off with brights. It lends a circus atmosphere to the fashion section, and while neons or hot pink and orange or, say, brilliant yellow pants might not be for everyone, it is all a ray of sunshine given how depressing the world is at the moment.

So I will try to scoff less and observe more, these ladies are on top of it. May I find their secret mall before all the good stuff is gone.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The elderly should be comfortable. They've lived life and have seen it all (and have made our lives comfortable). Their priorities are straight by now. Fixed-incomes and living on social security can put a real damper on the wardrobe. A little compassion please...